Fine, I’ll give you a quick update on me before I move on to the bitching of trivial matters. I am planning on making a trip back to Nebraska in a few months for all 2 of you who give a shit. Not that I blame you at all for not caring. If I were you, I wouldn’t care about me either. I plan to be in Nebraska for about a week, but the time I have set aside to visit friends is quite short. I plan to spend at least 2 days with the parents, which leaves 5 days left. Subtract the 2 days I plan to spend with Bob’s whore of a mother, and that only leaves 3 days to split between all of my friends. It’ll be tough, but I’ll make it work. What else should I update you all on? Oh yeah, I got one of my grades for last quarter’s worth of classes. That right bitches, another A. I have a better GPA in my Master’s Degree classes than I ever had a Dana, and I’ve done less work than I ever did at Dana. This Master’s Degree program, while expensive, is as easy as Bob’s mom after a shot of Jager. I’m not saying the subjects themselves or what I have to learn is easy, but as far as homework goes, there really isn’t any. A few papers to write here and there, but other than that, it’s a walk in the park. Add to that the fact I don’t have to write a thesis to get this Master’s Degree and I’m quite thrilled. It isn’t that I couldn’t write a thesis, it’s just that all the preparation that goes into writing something that large takes a lot of preparation and time. I absolutely hate the prep work.
Are there any other updates of interest? Oh yeah, one very important one actually. After being engaged for over a year, Sam and I have finally set a wedding date. The date is: July 12, 2008. 2008 you say? Why so late you say? Well, we figured since a wedding takes a lot of planning, we’d want ample time to do so. Plus, I want to actually finish that easy MLIS degree first and that should take another year. The wedding will be here in Denver, despite Sam’s parents goading us to have the wedding in California. I’m not going to have my poor friends travel all the way to CA to be in the wedding. I honestly don’t mean anything bad by saying that my friends are poor, it’s just that most of them have blue collar jobs and the one’s that do have better paying jobs, still don’t get paid much. They’re getting Nebraska wages, and that ain’t going to cover the cost of travel to CA and a place to stay. At least here in Denver, it’s a shorter travel distance and it’s easier for me to find places for people to stay.
Enough of me. On to the
Stupid MotherFucker of the Week Award
This week’s award goes to Novartis Consumer Health Inc. Yes, a large pharmaceutical company is indeed eligible to win this. Novartis wins because of their deceitful trickery of the consumer base, including myself. You see, I suffer from migraine headaches, though not very often. Maybe I’ll get a migraine twice a year, but when I get one, oh it’s bad. Bad enough that not only does my head feel like it’s going to explode, but I feel like I’m going to puke AND my left arm usually goes completely numb. I don’t wish that kind of pain on my worst enemy. Actually, I do. That’s right, Fuck You Ayn! I hope you have 2 migraines at the same fuckin’ time you dirty Whore!!! Anyway, back to Novartis. So, the last time I had a migraine, I was headed towards home and I stopped by Wal-Mart to see what over-the-counter meds they might have for my problem, knowing that I was out of Imitrex. Imitrex being a prescription med for migraines. Over-the-counter medicines rarely work for migraine sufferers. If otc meds work for your migraines, then chances are you don’t have migraines you whiney S.O.B. Well, I see Excedrin meds on the shelf, produced by Novartis. Excedrin wouldn’t work. However, next to it, I see another Excedrin product, labeled: Excedrin Migraine. A glimmer of hope formed in my pain filled head. Long story short: The Excedrin Migraine didn’t work. Yesterday, I looked at bottles of both Excedrin and Excedrin Migraine and I found out that both products contain the EXACT SAME FUCKING INGREDIENTS, in EXACTLY THE SAME GODDAMNED AMOUNTS. Novartis can kiss my ass. They know their product won’t work for migraines, yet they don’t even have the decency to try and alter the formula so it does. They just slap another name on it and sell it to people who assume that the medicine will do what it says it does. Hey, don’t just take my word for it. Look at these information pages on the Excedrin website:
http://www.excedrin.com/products/es_pl.shtml
http://www.excedrin.com/products/migraine_pl.shtml
That’s some unethical business practices right there.
On to the DVD releases for today. I would have posted this yesterday, but I took a sick day from work and slept half the day away. Was I actually sick? My boss will never know the truth.
- Akeelah and the Bee - I really don't care if I ever see this film. Sure, Roger Ebert gave it a thumb's up, but he also gives a truckload of Bostom Creme Pie a thumb's up. Fatass.
- Arrested Development: Season Three - This is yet another example of a really funny show that Fox cancells because they can't look at the "big picture."
- Brother Bear 2 - Another shitty Disney sequel that never should have been made. This is one time that I can see the value of poaching.
- The Chuck Norris Collection - FUCK YEAH!! Stay tuned for some Chuck Norris facts later on in this very blog.
- Darkwing Duck: Volume One - I watched this toon a lot as a wee little tot. All I have to say is: Let's Get Dangerous MotherFuckers!! I added the MotherFuckers part, but I think it sounds "edgey."
- Karate Dog - Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh....yeaaaaaahhhhh. It's time this dog be put to sleep.
- The Lord of the Rings: Limited Edition - This edition covers the release of all three films on DVD today. Each release has both the theatrical and extended versions of each film for under $20 a pop. Easily worth the purchase if you skipped out on buying the huge boxsets previously released.
- Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection Vol. 10 - In the not too distant future, I'll buy this if I ever have the money. Unless that is, I use the spare money to make my robot friends. One or two nerds who actually watch this show will get that last sentence, the rest of you will forever be lost.
- The Sentinel - This film seems like a re-hash of plots used over and over again, but with Keifer Sutherland in what seems to be a very 24-ish role, I'd still like to see it.
- South Park: The Complete Eighth Season - Because I can't afford to buy this, I feel almost as poor as Kenny.
- Stephen King's Desperation - If you're a die-hard Stephen King fan, then watch this. If not, you can pass. It isn't terribly bad, but it has it's problems, mainly acting. Wait for the recent Nightmares & Dreamscapes to be released on DVD if you want some Stephen King television done right.
- Talespin: Volume One - Many of you will remember this as fondly as you remember Darkwing Duck. I never really got into this show though.
- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Volume 5 - The 5th, highly anticipated, volume of the classic toon released for my viewing pleasure. I'm way fucking behind on this. I still haven't bought Volumes 3 and 4.
- The Tick vs. Season One - SPOOOOON!!!!! I've been waiting for this one for years and years. Finally, someone has enough intelligence to release this smart, and funny, adaptation of Ben Edlunds comic to the masses.
- Will & Grace: Season Five - I've said it before, but I completely despise this show with every fiber of my being.
That's it. I know I said I'd leave you with Chuck Norris facts, but honestly, I'm suffering from indigestion right now and I don't feel like entertaining you chuckleheads any longer.
I'm gone like Bob's mom's pants at a frat party.
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