All I can say is: HA!

Rad this and tell me it isn't funny:

http://www.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/02/13/cheney/index.html

Ok, so it shouldn't be funny, I admit that much. This admittance doesn't stop me from laughing however. It's long been rumored that the Republican party is full of rednecks and hicks that managed to crawl out of the deepest Ozark mountain valleys in a vain attemp to keep women and negroes from voting and such. Now no one can deny it. I mean, when the vice-president himself shoots a fellow hunter in the face with a load of buckshot while trying to hunt small birds, it's a pretty clear sign that he's a dumb-ass redneck. Now, I've been hunting before myself, and mistakes can happen, but I don't think I've ever fired a shotgun while I've had the barrel pointed in the general direction of...SOMEONE ELSE'S HEAD! It's too damn bad Cheney wasn't out hunting with President Bush.

Because then Bush could have got some quail meat too. Yeah, that's what I meant.

I should talk about the International ToyFair in New York and how cool everything is that's coming out this year, but for some reason, I don't feel like being a huge nerd this morning.

Regardless of this, I still am a huge nerd, but not as much as some. I have never gone to a sci-fi con dressed as anyone but myself. Actually, I've never been to a sci-fi con. I have been invited by William to go to the sci-fi con with him this summer in Toronto Canada. I would go if it weren't for three problems that plague this idea:
1: I don't have the money.
2: I wish to keep my dignity, and I can't do that while in a group of people arguing the physics of matter-to-energy conversion of a transporter system, or whether a lightsaber could cut through adamantium.
3: Canada
Thanks for the invite Bill, but I think Ill do something less nerdish with my time, like sit in my apartment and play World of Warcraft.

It's time again for everyone's favorite DVD review section!

• Charles in Charge: The Complete First Season - Oh fuck this! Who in God's name is going to buy this? If you really want to fullfill your need for Scott Baio, rent Bugsy Malone instead.
• Saw II (Widescreen) - I understand that people like twist ending to movies. However, making a sequel based off the popularity of a twist-ending to an otherwise crappy movie really doesn't work. I'm not a big fan or these types of movies anyway, so I'm biased to beging with, but all these films showcase is the writer's inventiveness on how to kill people. Fans of this movie said it was new and fresh. Obviously those fans haven't seen the film Seven, which is better in almost every way possible.
• Zathura (Special Edition) - This received good reviews, and I can't explain why. This movie is based off a book by the guy that wrote Jumanji, and essentially, this movie is Jumanji...but In Space! It's kinda supposed to be a sequel of sorts as I understand, but a rehashed idea is still a reheashed idea. My mother saw this film and I'll let her idea on the movie be your guide. My mother really liked Jumanji, but she really didn't care for Zathura. My mother also thought that Van Helsing was a good movie. If my mom liked Van Helsing, but thought Zathura was bad compared to it, that has to tell you something.

Those are the only 3 DVDs being released that deserve any comments whatsoever. As you can plainly see, there is nothing to buy this week. Since it's a short list however, I'll give you four more options that are too shitty for me to even insult:

The Golden Girls: The Complete Fourth Season - Overhaulin': The Complete Second Season - Roast of Pamela Anderson (Uncensored) - Shaq TV: The Reality Series.

Starting next week, we move into a period of time where almost every week has something good to offer, and Scott Baio isn't anywhere to be seen.

Since the list was short, I'll run down the film releases this year that I'm really looking forward to. You may disagree with me, but that's why I buy pepper spray.

• Night Watch (Nochnoi Dozor) - This is a tough movie to describe, so just watch the trailer here: http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/night_watch/hd/
• V For Vendetta - Yes, Natalie Portman is a bad actress, but I still want to see the film based off the stellar reviews I've read.
• Ice Age 2: The Meltdown - Admit it, Ice Age was funny. It's even funnier to me since I know this dumb redneck who shares the same stupid look on his face as Sid the Sloth. Oh, I laugh everytime I see it.
• Silent Hill - I love the freaky-ass, scare the crap out of you at 3 A.M. in the morning games this movie is based on. The director, Christophe Gans, isn't a total hack either.
• Mission: Impossible: III - I know, MI-II sucked ass. This movie looks to be a move towards much better writing and directing. Plus, with Philip Seymour Hoffman as the bad guy, the acting should be much improved as well.
• X-Men: The Last Stand - Excuse me while I whipe the drool off of myself. For me, this is the must-see movie of the summer.
• Superman Returns - Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor. That's all I have to say.
• Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - After the surprise the 1st film was, I'm hoping this one will be as good.
• Miami Vice - Yeah, you say it's stupid now, but did you know it stars Jaime Foxx and Colin Farrell? Did you know it's directed by Michael Mann, who directed Colatteral? I bet you feel like a fool now.

Alright, I think I'm done for the day. Next week, in addition to the DVD reviews, I'll bash the upcoming films that I don't want to see. That list is much longer.