Apartment Bliss

I use the term bliss when really I should use the term bane. Now, I'm not saying we have a shitty apartment, on the contrary, it's quite nice. What I am saying is that I'm a bit peeved that the door to our pantry fell off of its tracks. I'm a bit peeved that it takes quite a while for our bathroom sink to drain. And, i'm peeved that whenever I bring these issues up to the people that run this complex in their large chain of complexes, it takes them forever to solve the problem.

Also, we finally got the 2 bookcases that were replacements for the 2 that came broken over a month ago. Now we can finally shelve our massive DVD collection for easy viewing. You see, we ordered four of these stackable bookcases so that our whole DVD collection could be shelved together. The problem I now have with this is that 4 bookcases aren't enough. So now we have 4 bookcases full of DVDs and the rest filling up a shelf or 2 on the entertainment center. As I librarian in training, I can't fuckin' stand it! It drives me up the wall to see the uniformity in my cataloging skills broken up this way. It isn't just the diversity of storage shelves that upsets me, it's how they are shelved. In order to cram them all into what space we do have, I had to take all the box sets and shelve them at the end. Now, my 4 volumes of Batman the Animated Series aren't by Batman and Batman Begins where they rightfully belong, but instead are at the end of the collection. ARGH!!!!! DAMN MY ANAL RETENTIVE LIBRARY CATALOGING SKILLS!!!

So, Mervyn's is finally closed. Mervyn's is where I used to work one day of the week, which you'd be aware of if you read my blog on a regular basis, as some of you do. Thank you. Yesterday I had to stop by to pick up a paycheck and it's kind of depressing to see a store that was once full of merchandise reduced to an empty husk. All that was left were the floors, walls, celing, and a few register stands that were being dismantled via sledgehammer when I arrived. No one has any clue what business will take the building over, but if I had the money, I'd turn it into a bitchin' airsoft/paintball/laser tag arena complete with smoke machines, dead-ends, and minotaurs to stalk the maze-like halls. Minotaurs with paintball guns. That would be sweet.

The topic of minotaurs leads me right into the DVDs this week. How you say? I'm horrible at transitions and it seemed like a reasonable progression to me, that's how. Last week I said that future DVD releases would suck, and you'll be happy to know that, for once, I'm told the absolute truth.

• Dallas: The Complete Fourth Season - Well Yee Haw Pardner! This release makes me as happy as a rabbit in a sack full o' tunips! Do rabbits even like turnips? Do humans even like turnips? What the fuck is a turnip anyway? Is it in any way related to the Parsnip? Do rabbits like parsnips? I could go on for hours, but the point it, I won't be buying this just like I won't be buying any turnips, parsnips, or any other vegetable ending in "nips."
• Flightplan (Widescreen) - Don't get me wrong, I like Jodie Foster and all, but another movie where she is frantically trying to protect her child doesn't really interest me. This flight has to make an emergency landing at Boredom International Airport where an error is made and my baggage is mistakingly sent to the IDontGiveAFuck Airport.
• The Fog (Unrated) - The only fog worth mentioning here is the haze of bong smoke that filled the room where the studio executives decided to make this film. That loud sound you hear is the foghorn telling you to stay the fuck away from this movie....or cursed you'll be with a sequel. (Read the last phrase like a pirate and it sounds real cool.)
• Saturday Night Live: The Best of Alec Baldwin - Why the fuck are they releasing a "best of" of a host? At least they could do is release more DVDs of cast members.
• Saturday Night Live: The Best of David Spade - Well shit. Be careful what you wish for.
• Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Turtles against H.A.T.E. - Now my buddy thinks this is coming out tomorrow. My info says it will be out on the 31st. For once, I hope he's right, because I'd sure like to get this as soon a possible since there isn't anything else to buy this time around.

The DVD releases get better in the coming weeks, no really they do. How much better depends on whether you like what I like and whether you have horrible taste in 80's television like myself.