Edjewkayshun is stoopid

So when I was admitted to Denver Universityover a year ago, I was given a scholarship for half off of my tuition for my entire Master's Degree coursework. Even with that help, it's still damn expensive to attend DU. About $400 a credit hour expensive. So each 3 credit class it about $1200, if I'm doing the math right. To make a long story short, my bill arrived for my next 2 classes and they want me to pay, get this shit, $4700. $4700 for TWO GODDAMN CLASSES??! Obviously they "forgot" my scholarship. I mean even my half-off rate of $2350 would still be obscenely high, but $4700.....for TWO FUCKING CLASSES?? For that amount, there better be some Indonesian slave boy who'll sit beside me in class to take notes for me and do my homework for me while I look up porn on my laptop. I'm so angry I could beat every asshole in the Bursar's Office with a sockfull of quarters. Or a toaster in a sheet.

mmmmmm, toast.

I had to call Microsoft yesterday to solve a tech support question. You see, my computer won't update. Those critical security and software updates that Microsoft puts on their website that they say you desperately "need" in order to keep your computer from turning inside out and forming a black hole in your livingroom just won't install on my computer. So I've got a year's worth of updates that just don't want to install. Anyway, the woman on the Microsoft end of the phone tells me, "Our XP tech support department is currently closed." Am I the only person who thinks this is the stupidest thing I've ever heard? So then why the fuck are you even answering the phone if you can't answer a question on tech support? That's the goddamn reason %98 of people call microsoft. What is your job woman? Can you give me lottery numbers? Can you tell me how to diffuse a bomb using only Elmer's glue and a piece of BubbleYum? I hope so, because otherwise you're as useless as a condom machine in a leper colony. I can't think of more then 10 questions that could be asked that aren't technical support related. Microsoft my ass, more like Macroshaft.

There was a homeless man on the steetcorner this morning with a cardboard sign that read: "Anything Helps." I told him that I'd help him by reviewing the DVDs released tomorrow. A passerby might have thought he meant it when he told me to fuck off before collapsing to the ground sobbing, but I know what he really meant was: "Thank you kind sir." Those were tears of joy. Joy indeed.

• Babylon 5: The Legend of the Rangers - Being that I own every other Babylon 5 related DVD released, I might as well add this one to the lot. This is the only B5 movie I haven't seen yet, so it may or may not suck. I wouldn't reccommend getting this however if you've seen less than every series episode and every other B5 movie. You just wouldn't understand.
• Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (The Little Black Book Edition) - Maybe I'll just forget this movie was ever made and look forward to better movies, Like: Under Siege III - Nuclear Urinal Cake.
• Ghostbusters (Repackaged) AND Ghostbusters II (Repackaged) - So what the hell was wrong with the repackaged editions that came out 6 months ago?
• Good Night, And Good Luck - Damn good film. I'm a little dissapointed that David Strathairn didn't win best actor for the role, but since I've never seem Capote, I can't tell you whether David got hosed or not by the academy.
• A History of Violence - I can't wait to pick this bad boy up. Watching a film like this where lots of killin' is done always gets me in the mood to drive to Wal-Mart. I can't explain it.
• Ice Age (Super-Cool Edition) - If it's cheap, I'll buy it. Everyone needs a good laugh now and then and I'm sick of tripping children to get them. Actually I'm not sick of that quite yet.
• MacGyver: The Complete Fifth Season - This lasted 5 seasons?! Like Stargate SG-1, the continuation of Richard Dean Anderson's career is a mystery to me.

So that's it for this week, but there are a few that I will be picking up so that ain't too shabby. Now we've got some gems on the way next week, so keep your eye on the best blog ever.

No, MY blog shithead.